Posts published in Humour

The unexpected secrets of laughter

Saturday, January 26, 2019

US President Donald Trump was greeted with laughter in September when he told the UN that he had accomplished more than “almost any administration” in his country’s history. Mr Trump admitted that he “didn’t expect” that reaction – but that it was “just fine”. It was one example of the many reasons people laugh – and most of them are not because somebody is being particularly funny. Laughter is primarily a form…

The Robot

Monday, January 7, 2019

In the not to distant future a dad buys a ROBOT at a discount. The robot interface glitches and slaps the people who lie. (AT DINNER) DAD: Son,How’s school? SON: Great! We learned many things. ROBOT slapped SON SON: Ok,I went to the movies. DAD: What did you watch? SON: Toy Story 2 ROBOT slapped SON again SON: Ok, a rated R movie. DAD: I never watched movies like that.…

Ten Indications of a New Year Hangover

Friday, January 4, 2019

You get it into your head that chirping birds are the Devil’s pets. Trying to gain control of the situation, you continue to tell your room to “Stay still.” Looking at yourself in the mirror induces the same reaction as drinking a glass of fresh paint. The bathroom reminds you of the fairground cry, “Step right up and give it whirl!” You’d rather chew tacks than be exposed to sunlight.…

A gay sailor won the chance to have the “first kiss”

Wednesday, January 2, 2019

Bryan Woodington, 33, had just returned from seven months serving in the Persian Gulf and Europe, in time for Christmas. His name was picked out as the sailor who could disembark first and perform a ceremonial kiss, Queerty reports. It’s a scene San Diegans are familiar with; reunited service members disembarking from their ships after a lengthy tour and giving their loved ones waiting on the dock a passionate smooch. In…

Russell Grant’s 2019 horoscope predicts the next 12 months for every star sign

Saturday, December 29, 2018

Aquarius – January 21 to February 19 You’re too imaginative to get stuck in routine but your Aquarian urge for excitement and adventure comes to the fore as the year begins. Find something completely different to get your teeth into. The stars give you momentum to put thoughts into words and act on your ideas. Turn your world upside-down from spring to build a better world for yourself. Combining business…

Blind mystic Baba Vanga who foresaw 9/11 and Brexit predicted worldwide gloom in 2019

Thursday, December 27, 2018

A blind mystic who predicted Brexit, the Twin Towers attacks and the rise of ISIS has predicted “worldwide gloom” for the whole of 2019. Baba Vanga has been dubbed the “Nostradamus of the Balkans” for her predictions, which seem to strike with eerie regularity. And her life-changing occurrences for the next 12 months have been branded “gloomy and miserable”, and will blight 2019 in woe. Vladimir Putin will come from…

The 4 stages of life

Wednesday, December 26, 2018

The 4 stages of life: 1. You believe in Santa Claus 2. You don’t believe in Santa Claus 3. You dress up as Santa Claus 4. You look like Santa Claus